Grasping at straws here….

…. I can’t help it.  As much as I am still angry/hurt/resentful, I’m still trying to find some hope that this cycle isn’t totally lost.  I’m kicking myself right now for not temping this cycle.  So here’s what I’ve been thinking about:

The major left sided pain I had early Monday morning could have been ovulatory.  I chalked it up to being a cyst rupturing, because the last 3 cycles I’ve done on Clomid, I’ve never had ovulatory pain.  Going in for the u/s the following day, the u/s tech told me that my 3 mature-looking follicles had “irregular borders”, and some free fluid was seen behind the left ovary and uterus.  The left ovary is where I had the two bigger follicles (one smaller one but still mature on the right).  She told me it looks like they had already started the triggering process on their own.  But, if follicles degrade after ovulation, could this be what she was seeing?

It also would coincide with the OPK’s I had over the weekend……which still could be related to the Clomid I took…..I left them in my chart just in case.  We did have sex Monday night, so I’m holding on to hope that I could have ovulated Monday morning, and that Monday night was enough. 

If I’m crazy for thinking this, please tell me.   Or give me a virtual smack, if needed.

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